Confused by Christwire.org

So perusing a friend’s blog I came across an article advising women of the signs that their husband is gay. The site is christwire.org. It has taken me several hours to decide if the site is meant as a spoof or if this is a horrendously real example of when stupidity meets the propagation of the web.

I’m still undecided.

However, in the article, women are warned with ’15 commonly-accepted’ signs that their husband may be using the marriage as a cloak for his closet. Gems such as

Is he fond of winking at people?

If your husband owns skinny jeans and looks at his buttocks in the mirror or if he wears an inordinate number of small-sized t-shirts, it is probably worthwhile to pay more attention to his private activities.

A man who is secretly engaged in homosexual activity with others may exhibit feminine qualities when they get together in a group. In a sense, he has “let his hair down” and this will be seen in excessive back talk and speaking with one’s hands.

For a second, I thought this was just ignorance personified.  But just when I think the author is serious, I roll across a post chronicling the rampant but underground epidemic of cat rapings . . . . by rabbits.

Yep, I’ll just leave it at that…..

Top 5 Famous/Rich Folks Who Don’t Deserve Their Fame

[picapp align=”none” wrap=”false” link=”term=Kim+Kardashian&iid=6829131″ src=”7/c/3/9/Kim_Kardashian_at_b8b5.JPG?adImageId=7739813&imageId=6829131″ width=”500″ height=”769″ /]
Since I have never gone a month without at least one entry in Xpinionated, I bring to you the Top 5 Famous Rich Folks Who Don’t Deserve Their Fame.

5) Jared from Subway. His diet and weight reduction plan was based on a Subway diet. Are we to believe it was due substantially to his diet and an insignificant amount of weight loss was due to exercise? And if that’s the case, why aren’t the The Biggest Loser episodes just a bunch of challenges to get to Subway, kinda like The Biggest Loser meets The Amazing Race…The Biggest Amazing Loser Race. Yeah, Jared shouldn’t be rich and shouldn’t be famous for doing what he should have been doing in the first place.

4) Flavor Flav. Quite possibly the most unattractive human being on TV. Scratch that, outside of Nene from The Real Housewives of Atlanta, the most unattractive human being on TV. And close to the least talented. He was a hype man, not a rapper. Standing next to a rapper does not make one a rapper just as standing next to me does not make you funny. Out of nowhere, the part of Public Enemy that had no talent has returned to the limelight, searched for love from apparently blind and deaf women (that’s the only way I can imagine they wanted Flav), and even starred (used very loosely) in his own bad (used very tightly) sitcom. Seriously, his fame hangs on the balance of an oversized clock gimmick…..

3) Kardashians. Ok, Kim is fine. Not have-her-own-show fine but fine nonetheless. The other Kardashian girls? Notoriety from what exactly?

2)Tila Tequila. Maybe I have the story wrong. I don’t care enough to look it up and plus it wouldn’t change her position on this list or my feelings about her one iota. But let’s take a shot at this: girl opens myspace account, girl puts up progressively sexier pictures of herself on myspace, girl develops a myspace following due to pubescent nature of myspace clientele, MTV gives girl show based on myspace popularity. Meanwhile, there’s some poor kid studying his butt off at a community college in between his two part time jobs that MTV, and the rest of the country could care less about…..

1) Lauren from the Hills/The Real OC. It is no coincidence that MTV plays a huge role in the top two personas on this list. Lauren’s is a slightly different story. Rich kid living it up in Orange County. No particular talent. Just a willingness to let MTV cameras follow her around while she finds 1,231 ways to put the word ‘like’ into a sentence unnecessarily while working her way through MTV created drama. Woe is her life as her and her friends hop into the Escalade for another trip to the specialty Boutiques…..Her reward for being a rich kid with no real worries: a spin off show with the same high school drama…just without the high school..

P.S. Lauren excepts top honors in this list on behalf of the entire cast of the Real OC and the Hills.

The Bachelor – The He’s Just Not That Into You Finale

Finally, The Bachelor gets good! After years of pseudo happy endings, we finally get the Jerry Springer finale we all longed for deep down.

The Bachelor: Hey, you know when I said forever and love….?
The Winner: Yes, twas the greatest day of my life
The Bachelor: Yeah, uh, my bad. I meant to say that to your home girl not you.
The Winner: I thought everything was perfect. You bastard.
The Bachelor: I can’t stop thinking about shorty.
The Winner: Don’t call me, don’t text me.

And then Jason cries. Again. For the umpteenth time. There’s no man crying on national TV. Yeah yeah…trying to get that sympathy pitch from the female demographic but you gotta know they hate you now. You took Melissa (how hot it was that she kept referring to herself in third person) and dragged her heart through the mud…on national TV. So no sympathy for you crying wooliewag!

Jason has to be the cryingest man ever to grace the airwaves. Every highlight ends with this guy crying. He cries more than the women he’s playing.

Molly says she wants to know when Jason made the decision to choose Melissa. What she really wants to know is if that last night when she was giving it up to Jason, did he already know?

Molly’s initial reaction? WTF! Then after a couple of minutes, wait….does that mean I win? Did he just ask me out for coffee or drinks?

The Bachelor: I made a mistake…I wanna be your lover!
The Runner-up: So what about Melissa?
The Bachelor: Uh I screwed her over….again, my bad
The Runner-up:
The Bachelor: Let’s start over . . .
The Runner-up: Motherf***** please

That last bit was my interpretation but I’ll wait and get her answer…….BOOOO…..she’s giving him another chance. She basically rented him out to another chick for three months and now she’s getting Molly’s hand me downs (or tag backs or something). Oddly enough, Jason still hasn’t answered the question of why he chose Molly over Melissa.

Wouldn’t say we’re floored? Entertained, perhaps. But floored? No. Chris Brown putting a beat down on Rihanna — floored. Bachelor flip-flopping — not so much floored. Historic? This host is full of ’em. There’s nothing historic about a guy dating 30 women for three months and be looked at as a moral compass…….The annals of history are going to ignore this……..

H-O-R-S-E cents: NBA sells slice of Americana to glue factory – CBSSports.com News, Fantasy, Video

Because H-O-R-S-E is like apple pie and virginity: innocent and fresh (not even sure what that meant, but you get the point).

H-O-R-S-E cents: NBA sells slice of Americana to glue factory – CBSSports.com News, Fantasy, Video

Heeelarious. 

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Yet Another Reason to Hate Texas

Granted this isn’t new news, but it’s news to me as I’m sure it may be to some of you.  In Kleberg County, Texas, the official greeting is ‘Heaven-O’.  Yes, Heaven-O replaces Hello.  And yes, the reason is because Hello contains the word ‘hell’.  I really hate the state of Texas….and New York.  And Boston.  And while I’m at it, Colorado kinda pisses me off too.

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kleberg_County,_Texas#Religious_Laws

CBS Cares

It’s a quiet Sunday evening.  My wife, Devin, and I are enjoying a little 60 minutes before Amazing Race comes on.  A commercial comes on.  Below is the script of the commercial:

Woman from some CBS show:  “Ladies, do you want to make Christmas special for your husband this year?  Call his doctor and schedule a prostate exam.”

My reaction (sorry ladies) was ‘BITCH’.  You got me a finger in the ass for Christmas?!  Really?!  Now the women in my life who know me personally know that I make an effort to never use the B-word.  But this woman is on TV telling woman that the gift to get is a prostate exam.  I’m supposed to get you a diamond or a lexus and you’re gonna get me . . . . a prostate exam.  That gets an insult hurled!

Digital Irony

A study of World of Warcraft players aged 12 – 83 has found that after some violent gaming, the players were actually more relaxed or tired than aggressive. 

“There were actually higher levels of relaxation before and after playing the game as opposed to experiencing anger but this did very much depend on personality type,” said Jane Barnett, who headed the Middlesex study. Translation: If you’re an aggressive jackass before you play a video game, you’ll still be one after; and video games don’t magically turn peaceful people into violent offenders.

Hopefully, more studies like this one will make it to the mainstream media so every violent outburst doesn’t fall at the feet of gaming.   I dare wager that the same could be proven of music and other forms of media.  Though, these forms of media do effect us, the foundation for violence toward others is built on something more than an album, video game, or shoot ’em up movie. 

Technorati tags: Gaming Study, Violent Games

Possible New Tattoo

I am thinking about getting this tattoo on my back.  I have been going back and forth about whether I want to get another tattoo.  If I do get this one though, it means I will need to get a tattoo for every child we have, if I want to be fair and not show favoritism.  Whatcha think?  I may add ‘Lil Man’ above or below it….

New Interracial Marriage Site!!

There’s a new social network for those in interracial relationships!  The site’s creator is known to have a short attention span but if folks start showing up and the discussion is lively, I know for a fact that the site’s creator will try to maintain a lively community.  SO GO CHECK IT OUT —>  http://www.intermarriage.ning.com

Technorati tags: Interracial, Marriage, intermarriage.ning.com

Enough Oprah!!!

Announced recently, the Discovery Health television network will soon become OWN — Oprah Winfrey Network. 

In my mind, I can’t imagine that I am the only person in this entire world that is sick and tired of the constant ego trip that Oprah Winfrey lives.  A magazine featuring her face on every issue.  A school for kids in Africa — despite the need for such a school in any impoverished area of any metropolis in America — that bears her name but abuses the kids.  A television talk show that has become predictable in every facet.  And now a television network?!?!

Gimme a break.  Her ego has taken over.  If a sports celebrity, say Michael Jordan, decided to start a book club, open the Jordan Boys and Girls club of Chicago, create Air Magazine with his likeness plastered on the cover every single issue, and buy half of NBA TV so we could watch all Jordan, all the time, I guarantee the critics would be plentiful.  But if Oprah does it, she’s just giving back!  Look, the last thing Oprah has ever done was give back.  Oh, it may seem like she’s giving back when she gives everyone in the audience a new car (even though technically, I’m sure not a single dime came from her pocket), but the money she made after that news hit the airwaves easily dwarves any ‘efforts’ on her part. 

Well what about the Legends Ball she through not too long ago?  She threw a party for a bunch of famous people!  I threw a party for a bunch of unfamous people and ABC did not want to film it.  Hell, I’m not sure Oprah even deserved to be in that select group of folks. 

Oprah is a fraud.  She may be loved by millions but in my mind (and this doesn’t make me a hater — and if it does who cares), she’s a fraud.  An ego driven, narcissistic attention-whore.